Question: “How can you let go of such things like anger or pride? I have such a hard time becoming unattached and could really use help.”
I don’t think we can truly let go of all anger. Both the Dalai Lama and Thich Nhat Hanh, the most peaceful person I have ever seen, have admitted that they have moments of anger. I always try to stay positive, happy and all tree-huggery whenever I can. Until I drive… Then I hate everyone on the road! That’s where my pride bites me in the butt, because I’m assuming I’m a better driver than all the grandmas on the road and that I’d be one badass Nascar driver!
But… Mindfulness brings me back to reality and reminds me that, no, people aren’t slow, bad drivers, they’re just following the speed limit. And no, I probably won’t be a badass Nascar driver, because I’d probably kill myself just trying to get into one of those damn cars!
Thing such as anger, jealousy, pride, etc., all these are “fake,” made up feelings created by our own mind. These feelings aren’t real, you can’t see it, feel it, smell it, taste it – they are things we made up to make sense of situations that are happening to us. Why did you get angry? Because someone called you fat and stupid? Unless you’re actually fat and stupid, someone calling you that doesn’t actually make you fat and stupid. Instead, you allowed yourself to make what they said real, when it was simply just empty words that you could of just laughed at and let go.
And then there’s our pride. Our beautiful egotistical voice in our head that tells us that we’re just so much better than everyone else. But are we really? No. If we were, we wouldn’t be on Tumblr. In moments where we constantly compare ourselves to others, we’re failing to challenge ourselves to our fullest potential. There is no such thing as being number one. How many World Records are constantly being broken? Hundreds, thousands! Why? Because there is always someone better!
You think you’re the best at your job? You’re not. There is someone that is more educated and more experienced that could make you look like a secretary. Yet, our pride is always there telling us we’re better than everyone else. The result? Ignorance. Jealousy. Anger. Wrong view. Wrong path. So it’s important to be mindful as much as we can, so we can remind ourselves to stay grounded in any situation.
Of course meditation helps. Meditate on the Four Immeasurables (Compassion, loving-kindness, appreciative joy, and equanimity). The Immeasurables will, hopefully, remind you to stay grounded, mindful and present.
Smile and be well!