What are your thoughts on defending yourself when someone insults you, degrades you, etc.?

I’m perfectly fine when someone tries to insult me! 99% of the time I just laugh at them because I think it’s hilarious that they try to “hurt” me, but instead just give me a good laugh. Sometimes it’s an ego boost because by insulting you, they’ve taken precious time out of their day to actually put aside their lives and spend time on you. So I really don’t get bothered. Why would you? What benefit do you gain by allowing someone to insult you affect you? The ONLY way someone can truly  insult you is if you allow their insult to actually affect you.

If someone called me a fat cow, does that actually make me a fat cow?! Absolutely not! If someone called you stupid or an idiot, that person clearly doesn’t have the intelligence to truly understand reality or the vocabulary of an adult!

One of my favorite Buddhist stories, also sometimes titled as “The story of the angry man” is: There was once an angry man that was yelling and insulting the Buddha telling him that he was fake and had no right to teach others. So the Buddha asked the man “Tell me, if you buy a gift for someone, and that person does not take it, to whom does the gift belong to?” The man was surprised by such a question, but he replied “It would belong to me because I bought it.” The Buddha smiled and said “That is correct. And that is exactly the same with your anger.”

If there is anger within us, it is only there because we allow it to be there. No one and nothing can make us angry. We allow people and things to anger us which then causes us suffering and builds seeds of anger in our mind. When negative things happen, simply acknowledge it, ponder it for a minute if you need to, accept it and move on. Then that thought or feeling can simply come and go and you a free from its clenching claws of negativity. Practice compassion, especially to those you think don’t deserve it.


Smile and be well!


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