Question: “What is your view on dealing with difficult backstabbing grimy people at work? People who are sneaky? People who do not have good intentions?”
People who always seem “bitchy,” are always rude and difficult are simply insecure with themselves. They lack self-courage and self-confidence to be the person they wish they could be. It’s often a wall, a mask, or a means of self-defense when a person is being “bad.” People are inherently good and compassionate. We’re not born immediately hating people or animals. When children start pre-K or are in kindergarten, they can’t tell the difference between when someone is black, white, asian, or hispanic – everyone is the same. It’s society that shapes their perceptions to think, feel, and act the way they do.
Sometimes people are the way they are because of how they were raised. Psychologically traumatized or conditioned because of a past event(s) or lack of. If someone was raised in an abusive household, there’s a chance they too will become abusive because that’s what they know.
The only way we can deal with difficult people is by drowning them in kindness. We simply just have to be patient and compassionate. If they’re rude, backstabby, or sneaky, we don’t return the same behaviors. Instead, we stay calm and remember to be compassionate because there’s probably no one who’s compassionate towards them in their life. Over time, that person will see that you’re not bothered by their misbehavior and bad attitude. The only way someone can aggravate or frustrate you is if you allow them to do so!
The Buddha said, “When an evil-man, seeing you practice goodness, comes and maticiously insults you, you should patiently endure it and not feel angry with him, for the evil-man is insulting himself by trying to insult you.”
Smile and be well!