Desire and Attachment

Question: I’m really confused about the Buddhist view on ambition. I understand the point is to be detached from material things but if I really want to buy like a handbag or something should I try to not give in to what I want or is it ok to have material goals of owning specific things?

You have ambition on buying a handbag? That must be one hell of a handbag! Ambition is a big word with lots of power, and needs motivation to create it. I think the better word you’re looking for is desire. You have a desire to buy a handbag. So I’ll continue with using desire.

Desire is not necessarily something that has to be avoided. There is good desire and bad desire. In a way, we have to have desire to practice and study Buddhism so we can enlighten ourselves and become Buddhas, that is good desire. Bad desire is wanting excessive material things in the false assumption that they will bring us lasting happiness.

Let’s use the handbag example. Say you bought this super gorgeous, expensive handbag. You cradle it like it was precious gold and protect it from harsh elements and from getting damaged, as if it were a child. This goes on for a while maybe. But eventually your perspective on its beauty and important lessens and lessens, until eventually it’s “just a bag.” Eventually it was scratch, break or tear and it is no longer usable. You might get angry and sad because of it because you spent so much time trying to prevent those things from happening. So you suffer. The thing that brought you happiness is now the thing that causes you suffering. So then what happens? A strong desire for a newer, better, more expensive handbag arises and so you run after that desire until you catch it. This desire never seizes because we have a false perception that this handbag somehow “makes us happy.”

Happiness from external circumstances, like an expensive handbag, can make us happy, but true, lasting happiness can only come from within. When we truly understand the impermanence and transience of things, that everything will eventually age, break, crumble and disappear, then we become really happy with having a stable handbag from Walmart or Target.

 

Smile and be well!

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